Monday, October 25, 2010
Ah gots ta tell ya…had some strange convos lately….yeah dude…..Now…I know that Im not always going to be right and I sure like it when I find myself in a position to reevaluate something and change ma ways if ahm not zackly doin it the way I should or want. If I plan to master my future then I cant be a slave to my past. Even the past it seems can be ……..reevaluated. Some things are easy……others? Well….sometimes it takes a while for the crystal ball to cough up the answer.. Yes Trey Logan you………are a sooooper genius. Now I cant take credit here.
Try to see it my way,
Do I have to keep on talking till I can't go on?
While you see it your way,
Run the risk of knowing that our love may soon be gone.
We can work it out indeed. I do love the idea that some people are listening and others are…….just waiting to talk. I remember a heated discussion with my ex ( I was TRYING to have a discussion about how to save our marriage and she …..cleaned house…while I talked to myself) and at the conclusion I was told “if that’s the way you see it then I don’t WANT to see your side”.
Fewer things are worse than having a one sided discussion. Its bad enough to find out your talking to yourself. Its worse to discover that you’re the only one in the relationship…..and no amount of effort will fix things because your partner is emotionally crippled behind a wall that you cant get down. I like getting that wall down. Better still…..I like it when you take that wall down for me. That feeling of connection is something you cant get anywhere else, but if YOU cant let that wall down and …..I cant get it down……..well…. please have the courtesy to stay the hell away from me.
If you make yourself unavailable the result is……wait for it….…..you’re unavailable. Good plan? FAIL.
Think about it. If you’re running in the opposite direction…..how in the world do you expect to receive my affection? How are you going to feel that comfort you crave? How do you expect to feel safe and secure in my arms……….if you’re running away?
In the last year I’ve heard two separate dates tell me.
“I just want to be happy”
“Just once I want to wake up and be happy”
In my book that’s code for “I have no clue what happiness is or how it feels”
“Boy…… I sure have an early day tomorrow.”
Paper thin love isn’t on the list. Building love you can trust will always be there takes understanding yourself as well as your partner, a dose of selflessness and an ability to get through the rough times.
Reevaluating some past relationships….. I have discovered that I may have glamorized relationships that didn’t deserve it and underappreciated some that got the short end of the stick. If you cant say your sorry …there wasnt much of a relationship there anyway. Nothing lost….so no regrets! Sometimes it takes a while to see things clearly. I recently had the chance to make good one that never got full closure. We had some email exchanges and turns out shes doing well…her kids are almost grown and she just got a promotion…Im glad shes fine and wish her all the best. She will find someone just perfect for her I have NO doubt…...small smile.
I had a friend recently scold another for being too available. “When he calls don’t answer….call him back later and tell him you were busy…….dont be so available”.
I had another girl ask when she should text a guy back after they went out to dinner. The friends answer? “Never…...he should pursue her.”
Never? Ever?......... as in…not at all never?
And you want to know where all the good men are?
Ill tell you where they are.
Theyre out on a date with the girl who answered the phone.
Theyre out on a date with the girl who texted after dinner that she hoped they could get together again.
Theyre out on a date with the girl who let him know that wall is down and she likes him.
When its effortless its just…….the best. If the plan is
Step one: see which one jumps up and down and waves his arms the most to get your attention.
Step two: Ignore him and run in the opposite direction to see if how far he is willing to follow…..looking like a possessed electrocuted chicken
Step three: See if he can break down this unbreakable wall that you don’t EVER plan on letting down.
Step four: finally…mmmmm..…love
Well …that was EASY! Thats all there is to it?? WOW!
Not so fast…..no I think that’s a mistake.…..yes wait ……just a second ….Im sure ….its ……its.….Step four: schedule another unsuccessful girls nite out so you can try this harebrained routine again. Like I said……. keep the HELL away from me.
life is very short, and there's no time
For fussing and fighting, my friend.
I have always thought that it's a crime,
So I will ask you once again.
Try to see it my way,
Only time will tell if I am right or I am wrong.
While you see it your way
There's a chance that we may fall apart before too long.
Bring it…….bring a plan to fall in love that doesn’t involve being unavailable, hard to get and impossible to get close to. The love train stops so you can get on. It doesn’t chase you down, knock you over the head and drag you on board. The good memories come from having that wall down so keep your heart open. Then I can kiss your neck and hold your wrists and make you say “have me”. If you cant do that …well…you never had me anyway…...hehehe then I guess I ‘ll have to settle for …small smile…..watching you run the other way. Hehe ……OK….OK…..I got it!.....I got it!...we werent supposed to be together…..You win! You win! Hehehe.
Posted by me at 9:36 AM
Friday, October 8, 2010
Yeah dude ……glad to end ma label as punkee……the punkometer is ON and workin. fo sho. Testing testing…..1…2….3…….Yep itsa woikin…….asked a girl I know to give me a 5 mile ride while my car was in the shop……..even offered to put some gas in….she said……. “Could you put in $20?”…..I declined the ride …. …menu…..contacts…..erase. small smile……big satisfaction. Gonna put this blog here as well as on ma other blog cause it kinda fits…. K? Now I can’t take credit here.
Spend my days with a woman unkind
Smoked my stuff and drank all my wine
Made up my mind, make a new start
Goin' to California with an achin' in my heart
Led Zepplin indeed. I guess these things just don’t always go as planned. Yeah dude. My car is messed up and Im ….well….Im walkin……to work….to the gym….to the store……....in the rain. I borrowed a coworkers bike but after one ride my butt feels like a lifer at san Quentin and I nearly got killed by passing traffic.
So the bike is NOT an option. But in traditional Sooooper genius style Im gonna try and see this as …..forced cardio for the next two weeks.
Been a bit selfish lately on ma blog….been a bit on the ……ahma pissed off side while purging too….so I apologize for bein a buzz killer. Next rounds on me! Deal?
A friend o mine is struggling with an ex who has ……plenty of issues but I wanted to give up two pennies on the issue of guys and selfishness.
On the surface…..I don’t think most are gonna say being selfish is a coveted quality to have. Ya know? You would think that being selfless would be a more attractive feature for a guy to aspire.. Women all seem to want ……….a “good” man.
Preachers aren’t really high on the “boy that’s what I want” list. In fact bad boys, men with issues, and emotionally unavailable seem to attract a womans desires to fix……..nurture….or support something that’s obviously……..broken. AND impossible to domesticate. …………Enjoy. Lemme know how that fifth attempt with a cheater is goin…..sorry..thats wasn’t very nice.
In a mans world selfishness is …….well….viewed differently than they way women process “selfishness”.. Men applaud each other for being selfish.
Trey you are ……NOT…. a sooooper genius.
Men compete with each other for jobs, women, faster cars and more toys. The selfish guy is the one able to beat his neighbor to the punch. If a man is not selfish……he will not achieve respect among other men. Think about it. That’s why men are self centered, and me me me. Men measure their success differently than a woman.
Would you want a man that …..
lets you wear the pants cause hes too lazy to take the wheel?
I LIKE being in the drivers seat and I don’t plan on giving up my dark side bad boy attitude. Cause Its kinda hard to make a woman feel safe and secure if your slackin on the couch all day watching football. Companion? FAIL.
Selfish men are TAUGHT to have control. Its expected that they cultivate it. Growing up …….boys are told “when you grow up you have to……”
Control the race car
Control the spaceship
Control the defense
Control the sale
If you DON’T…….then……you’re a loser.
Control control control.
Are ya feelin me yet? A man without this ability ….…..you DONT want. So we strive to be the best…..and first.
I don’t know of any man that will say second place …..or LAST….. is just fine. We don’t strive to be last. The bad news is men aren’t very good at giving up control… at home that’s a bad thing. A woman doesn’t want to be controlled. She wants a man who’s IN control.
Which I hope helps explain WHY men aren’t very cooperative when they hear a wife say. “Uh..…you’re married now…..the kids come first.”
A real man will step aside for his lover….and being selfless so your lover shines is …..sweet.
A boys fantasy life about being a grownup includes things like…. fighter pilot, professional baseball star, or lead guitarist ………regrettably these have nothing to do with taking out the trash or doing laundry. And we don’t dream about such an opportunity.
Im just sayin.
We don’t always get it. We don’t always know how to turn off the control we’ve spent years trying to perfect. In our world control is a good thing. At home …well……its not. When a dad is teaching his son how to fix the car he doesn’t stop and say “remember son…….be selfless”.
So….These same qualities men foster to be kings of manhood aren’t really the ones we need to …..
Be a great partner….
Watch the kids……
Tell you we spent $300…… on a new guitar…
I gotsta put this in here… cause theres no good place to put it. I realize theres a bunch o stuff in this blog……..sorry…but I absolutely effin hate explaining my thoughts live to someone and they say…..”I don’t believe any of that”……that happened today.. I basically outlined what this blog was about and after about five minutes I had some woman say “I don’t believe ANY of that”….. “that’s not true for EVERYBODY”…..
Uh……. yeah I know that you moron.
When I say “guys”……. I screwing realize im not taking into account
Some guy in Indonesia who cant read and never heard of diet coke…..
A blind American Indian in1563
And your OCD brother who weighs 142 pounds …….and is a pastor.
For a girl (Oh…no…… here comes another blanket generalization that doesn’t apply to everyone) I think aspiring to womanhood has a different set of ideas. So we definitely don’t see eye to eye. Money, kids, money, family time, sex, household responsibilities, and money. All are a great battlefield to fight over…..not the best idea when you consider we both need a partner not a roadblock.
Still……….these qualities are what make a man a successful beast in the forest. Lets face it…do you want to bag a rabbit or a bear?
As a side note. You LOVE the uniform? Be prepared. Any body trained to wear a gun and get shot at ……will not be emotionally friendly or available. And here you thought he was confident, self assured and a protector. In order to do that job you have to be a bit distant, disconnected, angry, controlling and in need of stress relief.. Hows that for a “man of your dreams” recipe?
In a world where men compete with each other…….we admire risk takers. A man not willing to take risks is …..well……folding laundry. Small laugh….. So go easy on us for being…..…not the brightest.
No pain ..no gain. Nothing ventured …..nothing gained. Pack leaders don’t……..sit on the porch. My exwife always wanted to flog me for not being around. I wanted a thank you for working so hard, killing dinner and bringing it home. I didn’t get it. I got a divorce instead ……..when I caught her on her second affair.
Ive learned a lot since then……balance makes a great partner. The love train doesn’t stop for people who cant look in the mirror ………and see why they cant get a ticket. Take a close look at why the love train doesn’t stop for you. Its worth it. Passage on the love train is NOT a right. It’s a privilege you earn when you have everything in place to give and receive……when the train comes through town. No bitter baggage allowed. No carry on jealousy.
Standin' on a hill in the mountain of dreams
Tellin' myself it's not as hard, hard, hard as it seems
Bring it…………bring some love. Love is something two people create TOGETHER. It doesn’t……..arrive automatically by some guy who has the total package prewrapped for you to accept. Its not Premade, looking for you and waiting for you to just….receive it. …..if it meets with your approval. This is why there isn’t a round 8. Walls down and open arms. Sorry…….Tickets on the love train only come in pairs. I may be selfish but ……. sharing ma ticket? ……yeah I can do that. You comin or what?
Posted by me at 9:48 AM