whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Monday, February 15, 2010

Pining, cheatin, and the ferrari let down




Ok dude… ahma comin clean……..well……not exactly CLEAN….would you believe …less dirty? Would you settle for that? Small silence……Im a hypocrite. My last post was on trust and ahm breakin ma rules. And I cant tell you how many times I’ve preached truth is best. Not today. Now… gunna try an rationalize this but the bottom line is…..Ima cheatin. Now I can’t take credit here.

Your cheatin' heart will tell on you
Your cheatin' heart will make you weep
You'll cry and cry and try to sleep
But sleep won't come the whole night through

When I was a cub scout in 5th grade I spent an unbelievable amount of time preparing for the pinewood derby. Ya know those little cars you carve out of a block of wood? Well……..my dad I’m fairly sure didn’t even come to the race…….much less help build the thing. But I was very meticulous and spent every waking moment preparing the car. As a boy… ..you don’t know much about cheating…….other than ……don’t do it. Lemme say……I wasn’t smart enough to cheat. I just built the car lovingly. Sanded it, painted it…..made it look cool.

I remember that day. I came in second. I was……..pleased!. WOW!! Second place! Take that! And I did it all by myself!

My son……..is NOT having a good time. Surprise surprise…… I LOVE my son. We don’t get to see each other but maybe every other weekend. He lives 3 hours away. Its awful. I hate it. He’s been a scout for the last two years. When its pinewood derby time he and I get together as much as possible and work out what were going to do. It’s a wonderful bonding time. Working together……..using tools…..explaining things….
The spirit of the whole process is wholesome…Ya know? Really rewarding. Working within the rules……...doing your best even if you don’t win.
He’s come in LAST place both years. L A S T. Not near the bottom……..LAST. This past year he cried. Thats kinda tough especially when formula one is really part of our life. Hes even named after one of the team owners and this was a pic of us at indy last year.
Where was I?
Oh yeah....
I have to admit …two years of getting the smug, arms folded, “you’re a loser” smile from the other dads wasn’t the most pleasant thing for sure.
Enter …… adulthood…….there are all these websites dedicated to showing you how to………. Cheat. I look at them…then I look at the rules…. …then I look at them some more and then ……the lightbulb goes off. Everyone else is …….cheating. I mean not just a little. Its full blown, masterful, underhanded, blatant disregard for the rules that NO one will acknowledge because they’re ALL in on it. It’s a fantastic publicly secret lie like Santa Claus to a first grader. No cheating happens if it isn’t caught. The kind that happens ONLY BECAUSE the dads are involved. Moral fiber? FAIL. It’s just another great example of how the adult world pollutes and poisons innocence.
Ahm gunna be sick………….no……...pissed. If the kids were left to themselves there wouldn’t be any cheating! Won……derful.
The kids don’t know….. it’s the DADs……..I wanna do-over. better yet …..I want justice!!! ….. and then it happens.
I find this website that will sell you a winning car.

I look at it. …Blink…...blink

I see several cars that were AT my son’s race last year.

I’m……….steamed…….

silence……….…fan….tastic.

My son’s confidence is being destroyed by the ugliness that only comes from adults that have no honor or confidence. Liars. Cheats. Bankers. Lawyers. …….Assholes all.

Now I’m pacing……fuming…....The purity and the genuineness of the whole thing is marred, tainted, ruined by the day to day shitty world of adulthood….. and my sons the target. I tell ya ….I wanna go back to 8th grade. This is where……Ima gunna letcha down.
I make the call.
I won’t tell you how much but let’s just say you could buy a real car with the money this is going to cost.
The car will be here in 3 days.
I told my son I hired a Ferrari engineer to help this year.

Your cheatin' heart will tell on you
When tears come down like falling rain
You'll toss around and call my name

Bring it………bring it ……. Ya ..bit…..ches. Sorry……This is WAY out of character for me. And I’m laughing as I type. But I’m also mad. I’m not saying I’m proud of my behavior. Im not. I WILL tell him someday about the whole thing and this will no doubt garner some well deserved chastising and Im ready to hear it from my bloggy girls. But I gotsta tell ya. My son has already learned the lesson on how to lose and keep your chin up.. He’s learned how NOT to bend the rules. He doesn’t need that lesson again. We got it. We’ve had plenty of good times doing our best and some will say im lowering myself to a hollow victory…..but right now I feel like I’m leveling the playing field. THIS YEAR …we’re going to learn a different lesson. How to be a gracious winner

28 comments:

Seneca said...

Nooooooo! Trey! Ima dy'n over here! You are his example. What if you found out your greatest heros were cheats? We all win some and lose some, yah he will learn that in life. But to me, those who have INTEGRITY always win. Its about doing what you feel is right when no one else is looking, or even when EVERYBODY else is failing in life a.k.a cheating. What if when you tell your son in the future about this whole senario and he doesn't find anything wrong with it? By then he might think this behavior is ok. Or....you two can continue to bond and make a car that might possibly lose, get ice cream after and relate the loss somehow to relationships and love, then he will get a new lesson! All is well.....I still love ya. oh and p.s. I dig the COUNTRY. :D

"Seattle" Heather said...

It's a tough world. Plain and simple. And it's true...nice guys finish last.

I'll give you an example...I was failing algebra like you wouldn't believe my sophomore year of high school. I had taken pre-Algebra TWICE and still couldn't get it. I stay after school and was asked the teacher for help...I just couldn't get it and move forward to pass. Then the teacher had to leave early for school one day and left his answer key out on his desk and left us with a sub. The sub sat in the front of the class while one student swiped the answer key off the teachers desk in the back of the room. He asked for a bathroom pass and went to the office and made photo copies of the book. Then he sold the answers...I knew him pretty well. I was an honor student...but I was failing this class miserably. So he gave me the answers. And I ended up passing with a C. My mom was so proud of me for passing...I always wanted to tell her that I cheated to pass, but never got a chance because she died my Senior year. The fact is...do I feel bad that I cheated? Yeah just a little bit. I mean math to this day is not my strong suit (along with spelling lol) But if you're going to have your kid in a program we're there is cheating then I guess you have to play as the others play...or enroll him in something else...that doesn't tempt adults to be so keen on cheating. I mean it's all about Ego for the dads...their spawn is a direct reflection of themselves and their kid must win and be on top!
So I'm not going to judge you Trey because we've all cheated at something in our lives...it's just what we chose to do with it I guess that matters.

Christiejolu said...

AWE! I think you are a wonderful Dad! I can totally see where you are coming from! I think it is just great you are doing something with your son! There are a lot of Dads who don't make that kind of effort! Maybe when the car comes you can sand it together and repaint it together therefore you can still have your bonding time together!

Linda Medrano said...

Sorry Trey, but I'm with you on this one. I cannot bear my child's tears when they are being "dissed" by stupid assed men who don't even understand what this is all about. I'd do the same damned thing. You can't beat them, but you just did beat them. Screw those guys with no honor. You didn't design this game, but you sure as hell are a quick study. Let your baby have his moment in the sun. The unfairness of life is not his making.

The Invisible Seductress said...

ya know,, I think the saddest thing about Evan's dad not being in the picture is times EXACTLY like this. I try to fill the shoes of mom and dad but there are just some things that only a dad can do justice. Your heart is soooo in the right place here. He will only be this age ONCE, gracious winner sounds like a great lesson! Sending lots of hugs and Woohoo's for today and race day!!!

Linda Medrano said...

By the way, that son of yours is so gorgeous I would honestly kills, steal, cheat or do whatever was required for him. What a beautiful boy! And obviouly, the apple did not fall far from the tree!

Linda Medrano said...

Of course that should have said "kill" not kills but I got worked up, Mama lion that I am.

Rach said...

Trey. Trey. Trey. You are a hypocrite, in a HUGE way. I'm not talking about the car. That's up to you. But seriously, as much as you bitch and moan about hating country music, then you quote Hank Senior himself? Man, some people...lol Anyway, we're all hypocrites at times. I know I have been.

SkitzoLeezra said...

Trey, I like your honesty and will probably piss you off but gonna say it.
It woulda taken big balls to pick up one of those bogus cars and call out the cheaters. Huge balls. Your decision is the easy way, dare I say, a coward's path. I have such a sense of fair play that I would opt for being the loud mouth bitch that raised hell and embarrassed their kid, their troop and their town by calling out the cheaters but I'm crazy like that. Thank God I don't have children because I would be "that mom".

Shelly Rayedeane said...

I agree with skitzo. Cheaters really don't win in the long run.

What will happen when your son finds out the truth one day and thinks his dad doesn't believe in him enough?

The truth is if you turn those guys in, they will be disqualified and your son will go from last place possibly to first.

Ultimately, you can choose to stay silent or you can take action.

Don't be a cheerleader Trey. You really had me fooled there.

Cheerleaders are the types who only use their voice when they have a crowd of people to back them up. Same with bullies.

You ever notice how a dispersed crowd will reveal the cowards.


It is because there are two types of people in this world. There are those who can stand on their own two feet and those who have no individuality. These are the type of people I call sheep. Lol.

Don't become a sheep Trey. And don't think those big muscles are going to woo my ass. I ain't that stupid.

tattytiara said...

I don't know if you're cheating so much as you just learned the real rules of the game. You're doing what you feel is right for your son, and that's always the right thing to do.

Miss Angie said...

Wow... I think I'd want to take the high road and rat out all the other dads, but will that not work?

Also, what if some other dad comes along and overturns the cheating and your son gets disqualified with the rest of them?

No judgement... Just thoughts.

Cupcake said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cupcake said...

Trey, I disagree with every other chick here! You get that shit, you fucking win, and your son will be the happiest little guy EVER!!! He fucking deserves that shit!

Those other mother fucking dads can lick your balls, and you should take each one of them out back and beat the ever loving shit out of them for making your boy feel like that for the past two years!!!

I'm with you baby and I hope you kick the shit out of their piece of shit cars! And when you do, I want a picture of your baby's huge smile and that big ass trophy you're going to get!!!!!

Sorry, I had to delete my comment and fix a few spelling and grammar mistakes, I was all riled up after reading your post and the 'ghetto' bitch came through...

Rach said...

Well, Trey, you did say to bring it amd looks like lots of people did. :)

f1trey said...

To everyone- I wanna thank all of you for giving me your candid thoughts on all this..... Its been a real whirlwind of ups and downs and I appreciate everyones ideas about this and I think its evident that the conflict is palpable for me. I cant excuse myself in this and I want you to know I've weighed this over and over. I wish I could answer all your responses individually but my yime is limited right now and i hope that will change soon!!! peace my bloggy girls!

Carolina Girl said...

To me it's all about protecting your son! I think it's normal and natural to want to do that for him! Hey, I don't judge.

Cute pic by the way!!!

That stinks about the 3 hour drive :( Have you heard Zac Brown Highway 20 Ride? You'll appreciate it.

Carolina Girl said...

http://www.cmt.com/videos/zac-brown-band/466250/highway-20-ride.jhtml

Choleesa said...

I think that sometimes cheating is justified, and in this case it is. Good for you. I hope your son wins, and wins big, so that you could give that look back to each and everyone of those @ dads.

Amy said...

I'm usually a big believer in being honest no matter what, but sometimes....you gotta play dirty.

pissed-off said...

You're setting your son up like a stooge for a lesson in public humiliation. How's he going to feel as the finest piece of flashmatazz money can buy sinks in the mud under his hot objections that he and his dad are no cheats? It's his right to decide: lose with honor, withdraw with honor, or go out and cut throats. YOU DON'T LIE TO YOUR SON DAMMIT. -RS

Miss Angie said...

You have an award over to my blog!

April said...

I haven't read through all of the comments, so if someone's said this already well sorry for the repeat. I don't think you're cheating. You're just leveling out the playing field. You're playing the game THEIR way. Right or wrong at this point doesn't matter. Go get 'em!

April said...

But I just thought about what I would do in that situation. I would print up the websites where you found the purchased cars used in the previous races and I would show who ever is in charge of running the race. I would throw all of the other dads under the bus. Because you know what? I don't think the people who created this race intended for it to be about winning. Their intentions, I'm sure, were to have children learn how to make a car. To let the children have a bonding experience with their parents. And that's what it should be about. So, fuck all those cheating dads. Throw their asses under the bus and call them out for being the fuckers that they are.

f1trey said...

Thanks girls! I appreciate y'all takin the time to lemme know whatcha think on this one...wish i could get on more often to respond appropriately but that will come eventually....the race is this weekend...... peace!

Linda Medrano said...

Good luck this weekend. There's an award for you on my site! Come by and grab it!

Dutch donut girl said...

Winning and losing is a part of life. Spend as much time with him as you can and love him with all your heart, that's all I have to say.

Barbarella said...

Go Trey!! - level the playing field because it's a game called life!

:-) Can't wait to hear how you do x