whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Monday, April 12, 2010

a lemon farmer, The last child, and a couple of bags of dirt


Oh dude…..I am READY. I am SO ready. O…..yeah. I am SOOO……wrong. I was …Not ready dude. I.’m losing you again aren’t I ???
Practice was great this Saturday. It was Sunday that I couldn’t move. I made the right choice though. This franchise has talent and my body is FEELIN it. As per usual. I missed the mark. Been training hard…...just not hard enough I guess. Sunday I could barely get around. I wrapped my left thigh, knee AND ankle and went back to bed. When I woke up my whole left leg was swollen. I looked like the Travelocity gnome with elephantitis.
Fan…….tastic.
I guess its time to raise ma A game. Either I underestimated my teammates or I was overconfident. Either way…… Ahm diggin deeper. Lemme say….. I can be underestimated too……small smile….Now I can’t take credit here.

Hate's in the city
And my love's in the meadow
Hands on the plow
And my feets in the ghetto

Ok….ah got schooled……pay attention Trey……No part of the plan included getting thrown from the horse…. Oh well ……back on the horse dude…lesson learned….. I do have more to learn but gunna survive... I’m a quick study so the next step is to haul ya back to the classroom…whether YOUR ready or not……...wry smile. Some things just do NOT go as planned…….last child indeed….
Getting by is one thing……livin is another. I was horrified once when my grandma told me she and my granddad always did JUST enough to get by ……and that was all.
Fan..…..tastic
I’m part Italian so it took a fair amount of restraint to garnish ma tongue. Because what I was thinking was “that explains why the family is worth a couple of bags of dirt……” Haha..….wait..….what?
Boy that’s not pretty. So the thought never left my lips. Bullet dodger mode fo sho…….I faired better than the time I caught her eating an ENTIRE box of Whitmans chocolate. Ya know those big sampler deals?? Getting by was a GREAT plan …….to get her a SECOND set of knee and hip replacements. Bright idea? FAIL.
I stared at her as she popped them one after another……stoopified …….. Blink….blink…
I casually said she SHOULD be exercising. Her enlightened response? “I work around the house.” I….raised my voice a bit….. “That’s LIFE grandma!….....thats NOT exercising.” When I realized she wasn’t listening to me AT all……… I went to the kitchen.
And came back with a beer.
I flopped down beside her and popped the top for effect. I licked my lips and took a long slurping satisfying guzzle. Gulp……gulp…….gulp…..Ahhhhhhhh.
I looked over
Gramma was staring at me.
“you really shouldn’t drink”.
“O gramma” I scoffed….”its never to early to pickle your liver or get another knee replaced….besides….I work around the house.”
She didn’t like that answer.
It wasn’t a proud Kodak family moment. Her with a 6000 calorie Whitman sampler and me with a Bud lite.

Hypocrites 2…….Communication 0.

Where was I?

Oh yeah

I think its easy to underestimate or undervalue whats important. (thanks ....Trey Logan..…you …….are a sooooper genius) In my world it happens a bit too much for my liking. Getting by aint a lot of fun when livin is really what youre after. I wish things were different……. Meh…….wishin don’t make it so……. Im sorry to say. Ifn I had ma way Id letcha get your wish. Personally Id be wishin for fewer lemons…..and to have your head on my chest.
I know too many people who are getting lemons from life far too often. It might be good for me to consider becoming a lemon farmer……You make the lemonade and we’ll be getting somewhere.
In football underestimating the defense is……..not a good idea. Be ready…...or be ready for pain. One thing you can count on…….the hits just KEEP comin…..till they get you down. SO I better plan on getting up ……..every play.
The love train doesn’t stop on the bad side of town often. When it does stop on easy street…its only there for a while so ya besta be ready!! So be prepared to wave as it goes by ..…..or make peace to find your own happiness. That’s the secret for two tickets to the gun show or a pass on the love train. But more than that……..
My stock as a man is measured by my ability to stand up when theres a storm. When things are good…love is easy…….its when things are tough that I need my character to be a rock….….for my lover. Cuz fair weather love wont last long.
I need to remember that.

I was a last child
Just a punk in the street

Bring it……..bring a better plan. Maybe together we can come up with sumpin that will make us both smile. I’d vote fuh that ma love. How bout the best defense is a good offense? I am SOOOOO ready. You playin or what?

8 comments:

The Invisible Seductress said...

I hope you are feeling better..And this sounds weird,, but I am proud of you!! I know you will be the MVP of that team...Just like you are my MVP blog dude!!!

xoxo

Anonymous said...

Sore muscles hurt!

My Mom says she is exercising while she is working around the house. I tried to tell her it isn't exercise if it is done every day. No one listens to me!

Linda Medrano said...

Oh Trey, is that your real granny? My grandson Cyrus is my best friend and at 17, that's pretty special. I'm his favorite person in the world, and he is mine! Knee replacement my fanny! I hope you are feeling better Honey. That smarts I know!

Just telling it like it is said...

What dancing around naked isn't working out...note to self...must use weights...who knew?

me said...

@ Invisible- hehehe the pic is the son this past weekend at DOKKEN and great white!

@ CJ- hehe I listen!! sometimes... what?

@ Linda- Yeah gram was a tad opinionated.... hehehe

@ Just- hahaha i think you can just show up.....

Anonymous said...

I'm playin! I'm totally playin. I know what I want... I already found it once... shit, does that mean I won't get it again? Ah well, here's to trying...

Hope you are feeling better soon... and quit yer crying... there's no cryin' in baseball baby!

xoxoxoxo

Just telling it like it is said...

Okay this is totally not on the subject...but did you except me on face book?

me said...

@ Love - right on all counts!!!! XXX OOO
@ Just- Was that you? LOL i thought that was someones mistake...this is too funny..i didnt accept it cause i didnt know your real name!!!! send it to me again!!!!! PLease!