whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Saturday, December 15, 2012

The paper route, out after dark and painting from a rope.



Every word of this is true and if anyone else says otherwise they are a liar. Still happy in ma skin. Just getting started with explaining some premarital history for my kids who never got to hear about their dads past.  There is much still to tell and this is just backdrop….for the moment.

Now I cant take credit here.
I want to fly like an eagle
To the sea
Fly like an eagle
Let my spirits carry me

Fly like an eagle indeed.  When I was in fifth grade ..around 1975…my parents told me we were moving to Chatham... It was a very difficult time but I knew things would be okay…. I would have to give up my friends but I knew that I would make it and this was a new adventure..I still remember moving everything into a u haul van for the long slow trip.   My dad had gotten a job as a food broker and we needed to move closer to where he worked because he was traveling two hours to work every day and 2 hours back... I have to say that my time in Chatham was amazing.  I really enjoyed myself and there was much to see and do.  It was a small town with a main street courthouse and hotdogs for 35 cents in the trolley car diner.  Gum was still a penny. Only two sodas…coke or pepsi…diet sodas hadn’t been invented yet!   I urge my kids to go there just to see where I grew up.  On the radio was David Bowies song fame, Elton John, and the Doobie brothers…. And oh ….yeah…music was starting to peak my interest.
I was still raising myself but there was a lot to do in such a new place so I was always busy. We moved into this very big old house right in front of hargrave military academy and I had a very huge bedroom, big wooden staircase, tall ceilings and floors that creaked with every step.  The town was very quaint and small and I soon got a paper route.  The town was predominantly black in nature but on main street lots of little shops and I rode my bike every day on my paper route all through town..  I would get home from school grab my bike and ride down to the courthouse where I would load up with papers to travel all around town getting home after dark and after dinner…. It took about three hours to do every single day ……rain or shine, cold or hot. Sick or not.  Sunday morning I would have to be up before 6 and it would take all morning to deliver all the papers in town because they were heavy and my route was bigger..  My mom got a job at the local private girls school and I was home by myself when she was not there.  On weekends I would go to Chatham Hall the local private girls school and ride horses as I had riding lessons and that was a lot of fun…. I watched just a little bit of television…and by then I was losing interest in television anyway. Especially because I got my first real girlfriend kiss…. Hahaha Julie sanders.  The military academy principles daughter no less.  ( hey ..I aimed high.)  We did everything together ..much to her dads disappointment. 
Being on my own I developed certain kinds of hobbies that were lots of fun ….. I used my money from the paper route and bought a CB radio and then I got a chemistry set, an electric science set, a train set, model rockets and then I would buy comic books at this little gas station where I could play pinball.  During the summer I would go up to this little creek to catch tadpoles and crawdads. I would spend the whole day there making dams in the stream.  My parents never seemed concerned about what I was doing or where I was and I would show up frequently past dark …way past dinner. Sometimes I would stay out till 10 or 11 o'clock at night with no supervision at all. But no one would ask where I was or what I was doing.  Truth is they didn’t give a shit.  That summer Jody Emick and I would go to tennis camp and my cousin Steven would come down and we would play together. I looked up to him as the big brother I never had. By this time I had started building models of spaceships from Star Trek or cars, battleships or planes.  It doesn’t sound exciting but for me it was.  There were few children to play with so my time was spent tearing things apart to see how they worked..or building something.  It was very satisfying and a great way to learn about things. 
I was never told until years later but at this time something very bad happened to my sister.   she was …taken advantage of….by a guy that lived down the street.  I don't even think my parents knew at the time.. But the bottom line was that my mom was not careful enough to let my sister go down to where he lived…and he had FIVE brothers…. .. I do blame myself for not being more attentive to her …it was not her fault…. but I do blame my mother for being not smart enough to realize she should not have let my sister go there. 
I was able to do things physically the other kids could not.   I could jump higher, run faster, and longer than anyone else.   I was very proud of my abilities...and still am.   I was always first picked when it came to football.  Always.  I could …and did ….run for a touchdown no matter how many people were trying to tackle me ……every single time.  …. I was unstoppable physically….even with kids 3 and four years older than me.  Even better….bring em on.  One play….kick off..…touchdown.  It was great to play running back again in semipro as an adult…fantasy come true. 
I built my own pinewood derby car (dad didn’t help at all) and came in second at the championships….I don’t think my dad even went.
One time I remember my dad tied a rope around my waist and lowered me off the roof with a can of paint and a brush because it was too high for the ladder to reach from the ground.  So I painted the outside of our houses third floor….suspended in mid air.
We were there are only two years when my parents decided it was time to move back to Botetourt county..
For my daughter:  to watch you in gymnastics was …amazing.  It was so much fun to take you to practice and watch.  I was too proud to leave.  I will never understood why your mother would take you and drop you off then come back when it was over to pick you up.  
For my son: You are the king big stuff.  The crackshot with a bb gun.  Fweeeepss……..ster!!!!!!!!!!  Miss bein on the boat with you!!!!  Playing grand theft auto and watching led zeppelin…..  big smile
Fly to the revolution
Bring it……that epiphany….that catharsis….that shakabuku…..hehehe  I miss seein my kids.  But more importantly I know they miss having a dad they could count on.  I know how they feel.

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