whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Love, 1845, and sending in the clowns

Dude…… you know how Im big on motivations? You are going to like this post…...really! I am going to demystify something very important…….Ready? Why is the divorce rate so high? I’ll tell you RIGHT NOW.
Its because people in modern western society marry for love……. ??????......... what was that again??.....L O V E. When the love is gone there is nothing else to hold it together. Now I cant take credit here.

Isn't it rich?
Are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clowns.

I want you to follow me closely on this. Pretend its 1845. Why does a girl in 1845 in Iowa get married? I’ll tell you why. Shes 14. and the man she marries is the boy who lived close enough to borrow his dads horse and was within RIDING distance of your house and could take Sunday afternoon off to meet you AND your parents on the front porch of the house. Read that again.
How many guys do you think come by? Be serious….. 3? ….. Maybe? What if they were all ugly? Theres a darn good chance….. have you seen pics from that time? No hot showers…….no regular baths……..razors….makeup and hair supplies….. Oh yeah appearances were NOT stunning. In fact theyre downright frightful. So now your parents get to choose which guy your going off with...not you...and its…between the two that showed up…. ….. you may not have EVEN kissed the guy yet!!!!! Hows that for match making???? You did NOT pick and choose as you wished.…..Read that again.
So now your married. Living on a parcel of his folks land. The kids come quick. 2, 3, 4, 5. How many people do you see a day? ……. Ready? No one other than your husband……No internet, no PHONE …..no CAR!!!! …. NO CAR!! The nearest neighbor is at least 10 miles away. There is WORK to be done around the house…..the daughters are with you and the boys with their dad in the field. There is NO walmart!!! You don’t go to the store except on Sunday. In fact you don’t even leave the house all week!! And no one stops by!!! Do you realize how long and far it is to ride 10 miles ON A HORSE.???? THERE ARENT EVEN PAVED ROADS!!!!! YOU SEE NO ONE!!! NO……ONE!!! Read that again.
NOW….is all that sinking in?????? Visualize this world…….Hey just divorce the guy if you don’t like him anymore!! Come on……. just give him back the ring and …….and……what? Get a job? Wrong……there were no jobs for women…. Period. NONE!!!! Heck you cant even read or write..... Take the kids and get an attorney!!! R……ight……Get an apartment!!........where? They have apartments in rural Iowa?……r……ight….you didn’t EVEN own anything other than the clothes on your back that YOU made. No TV, No texting, No computer. Is this picture getting clearer?????? Love had NOTHING to do with getting married. Read that again.
It made NO difference whether you loved your husband or not. You were NOT getting divorced. Period. He worked the land and brought in dinner. You prepared it and mended the clothes….ya old, stinky, no toothbrushin hairy leg thing you…….You wouldn’t even live to be 40 years old!!!!!! It didn’t matter whether he beat you, you didn’t like him, or he stayed drunk all the time. Hows that for fun?????? You think you got troubles NOW????

Just when I'd stopped
Opening doors,
Finally knowing
The one that I wanted was yours,
Making my entrance again
With my usual flair,
Sure of my lines,
No one is there.

Bring it………..bring some magic for the show……… People get divorced now because when the LOVE wears off there is nothing left to hold it together. That’s why a happy relationship is built on MORE than love. More than his choice of car. More than his height. It survives because its kind and thoughtful. It survives because its based on respect and care. …….If this is a circus, then I want someone I love next to me…so give me your hand …….send in the clowns.


Kimberly said...

Clowns are evil Trey. One time I heard a guy say about another guy's wife "why would he cheat on that pretty thing". Well, why?

Sometimes I look at couples & I think, I wonder if he wants a prettier thinner woman? The answer to myself is always yes but I know there is often more to cheating than just looks.

f1trey said...

@ Kimberly- hehehe clowns are evil!!!
Your friend cheated because he had comitment issues ..and youre right! looks ARENT everything! you answered it yourself!

Im surprised you said the answer is alwasy yes...I dont fell that way at all....when I have been in love it takes alot for me to give that up.........

Bombshell BLISS said...

But the point you miss is that the men were willing to look after the women who didn't own anything or see anyone. They could look to their husband to be the one to meet their needs. The men I meet are so into meeting their own needs that their response to me is usually, "I don't want to meet you needs, but I want you close enough if mine need meeting". And that my friend, is why most women get 'tude.

f1trey said...

@ Bombshell- LOL thats a whole nuther subject! hehehe.. Think about this...
what were the needs of a man in 1845? COMPLETELY different ill bet than the weenies out there these days. They couldt read or write and shoot it wasnt too far in the distant past that they thought the world was flat!!! LOL

Men are taught to be selfish I agree...... meetin someones needs i think was different in the past.... more simple..ya know?

"Seattle" Heather said...

Fact: Everyone is selfish.

It's how you project it that defines who you are.

Barbarella said...

So what your'e saying is - we had no choice then and we do now. Hmmmmmm.

Shelly Rayedeane said...

Looks aren't everything, but integrity means the world to me.

It doesn't matter what face a person shows everybody else if they are lying to people and hiding behind those lies.

I agree with Heather.

However, some people project that they aren't selfish when they actually are!

Btw, what in the hell is up with all these 10 letter word verification? Krikey!

Just telling it like it is said...

I always say I am the one for you cause I know all the dirty things you like to do...I'm the fear in your eyes I am the fire in your flies I'm the one that's turning around in your head!!!

f1trey said...

@ Heather- XXX OOO christmas is coming and you bettter NOT be selfish!! hehehe

@ Barbarella- Yes I believe thats so to a point... The universe explores what options are available to it.

@ Shelly- Sorry I didnt know i had the verification thing was ..I hate those things!!

f1trey said...

@ Just- cool...... passsion is a real motivator for sure...walk like you talk it baby!

The Invisible Seductress said...

Today I think a lot of divorces happen because couples become business partners. The complacency takes over. We forget the details of being lovers and friends to mull over who picks up the kids and goes to the store. The appearance of a happy family wins until someone figures out it IS just that-- "appearance", and they need more. By that time they have most likely barked up another tree and do not wish to "settle" with their spouses. Just a thought. Ravage your man without warning or schedule...I shoulda done that more!

f1trey said...

@ Invisible- I'll be home in time for supper..... hehehe

"Seattle" Heather said...

Trey: Moi? Selfish? Tee hee. Christmas...I love Christmas it's my favorite time of year. I love to give and receive.