Thursday, December 3, 2009
Love, 1845, and sending in the clowns
Dude…… you know how Im big on motivations? You are going to like this post…...really! I am going to demystify something very important…….Ready? Why is the divorce rate so high? I’ll tell you RIGHT NOW.
Its because people in modern western society marry for love……. ??????......... what was that again??.....L O V E. When the love is gone there is nothing else to hold it together. Now I cant take credit here.
Isn't it rich?
Are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clowns.
I want you to follow me closely on this. Pretend its 1845. Why does a girl in 1845 in Iowa get married? I’ll tell you why. Shes 14. and the man she marries is the boy who lived close enough to borrow his dads horse and was within RIDING distance of your house and could take Sunday afternoon off to meet you AND your parents on the front porch of the house. Read that again.
How many guys do you think come by? Be serious….. 3? ….. Maybe? What if they were all ugly? Theres a darn good chance….. have you seen pics from that time? No hot showers…….no regular baths……..razors….makeup and hair supplies….. Oh yeah appearances were NOT stunning. In fact theyre downright frightful. So now your parents get to choose which guy your going off with...not you...and its…between the two that showed up…. ….. you may not have EVEN kissed the guy yet!!!!! Hows that for match making???? You did NOT pick and choose as you wished.…..Read that again.
So now your married. Living on a parcel of his folks land. The kids come quick. 2, 3, 4, 5. How many people do you see a day? ……. Ready? No one other than your husband……No internet, no PHONE …..no CAR!!!! …. NO CAR!! The nearest neighbor is at least 10 miles away. There is WORK to be done around the house…..the daughters are with you and the boys with their dad in the field. There is NO walmart!!! You don’t go to the store except on Sunday. In fact you don’t even leave the house all week!! And no one stops by!!! Do you realize how long and far it is to ride 10 miles ON A HORSE.???? THERE ARENT EVEN PAVED ROADS!!!!! YOU SEE NO ONE!!! NO……ONE!!! Read that again.
NOW….is all that sinking in?????? Visualize this world…….Hey just divorce the guy if you don’t like him anymore!! Come on……. just give him back the ring and …….and……what? Get a job? Wrong……there were no jobs for women…. Period. NONE!!!! Heck you cant even read or write..... Take the kids and get an attorney!!! R……ight……Get an apartment!!........where? They have apartments in rural Iowa?……r……ight….you didn’t EVEN own anything other than the clothes on your back that YOU made. No TV, No texting, No computer. Is this picture getting clearer?????? Love had NOTHING to do with getting married. Read that again.
It made NO difference whether you loved your husband or not. You were NOT getting divorced. Period. He worked the land and brought in dinner. You prepared it and mended the clothes….ya old, stinky, no toothbrushin hairy leg thing you…….You wouldn’t even live to be 40 years old!!!!!! It didn’t matter whether he beat you, you didn’t like him, or he stayed drunk all the time. Hows that for fun?????? You think you got troubles NOW????
Just when I'd stopped
The one that I wanted was yours,
Making my entrance again
With my usual flair,
Sure of my lines,
No one is there.
Bring it………..bring some magic for the show……… People get divorced now because when the LOVE wears off there is nothing left to hold it together. That’s why a happy relationship is built on MORE than love. More than his choice of car. More than his height. It survives because its kind and thoughtful. It survives because its based on respect and care. …….If this is a circus, then I want someone I love next to me…so give me your hand …….send in the clowns.