whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Homecoming, the whip, and the milestone


Yea dude! I reached a milestone! A revelation! A rite of passage! I broke 100 posts! Of course I missed the actual 100th one… (LOL that’s typical)…this is like 102 or something……The bad news?? I might start doing some reposting….LOL. you know how much I like revisiting my past!!! And I’m probably going to be posting less often…. Im sorry because truly its nice to have all of you along with me…and I love reading all your blogs!!!!!!…I just need a little time to refocus……..wonder if we will get to 200 posts???……LOL something to look forward to!! So for now I’m dancing a little jig!
When I was senior Sonya invited me to go to her homecoming dance…..”really?......are you sure?” I got this “are you talking to me look”….. my head …..sideways….. like a puppy.…..”yeah…that would be great!!” I’m thinkin…..What in the world is a rich, good looking girl from Northside doing asking me to her homecoming dance?? …. Fever??.....Did she lose a bet??...... wait a minute….. this a joke ….right? I mean someone dared you to bring a hick to the dance…..or something….
Now…….lemme say that ….I LOVE music……and when I say LOVE….I MEAN IT!!!! My dear followers…Ifn ya only knew how much money I have spent on guitars, basses, drums and keyboards over the years you would certainly die from sticker shock….. AND……even though m a guy….…I love to dance……..Now I cant take credit here.

When a problem comes along
You must whip it
When something's goin' wrong
You must whip it

Now…...none of this would normally be a problem…….except we end up IN the dance contest……..Now…Im going to date myself here…….Back in the day we had…….FUNK. Earth Wind and Fire, Rick James, LTD, I mean….. whos gonna NOT like Parliament-Funkadelics????
Where was I?
Oh yeah……. So….we get into the FINALS and ……….Nobody of course knows who I am cause this is NOT my school!!!!! So…… its turning out to be a GREAT date….Sonyas all jazzed cause shes with Mr mysterio……… and we’re down to the last two couples….. and me???? Im NOT worried….. this is going to be a night to remember BOY!!!!!
And then……………….
The DJ starts to play……………..whip it……….
by DEVO……..
ogodogodogodogod………
I look over at the DJ and all the blood runs out of my head……
What in THE #$%# … is…. this …..#$^&@ ing ….. Sh&*???????? You CANT dance to this??????? can you? Can you dance to this??? OMANOMANOMAN..…. Im just……...standing there. Sonyas…… STARING at me……
True story……..Sonya SCREAMS…….. “DO SOMETHING!!!!”
SO………
I start flinging myself around ….flailing my arms like an idiot……. I look like a chicken….. that’s being electrocuted……...seriously. Im clearly…… in pain… because I HATE punk…HATE IT……..Im flinging myself around the room like a schizophrenic epileptic……. Im having a seizure…..…Im fightin myself….Im seizing ….Im fightin myself…Im seizing AND fighting myself at the same time. I look like Im possessed……..by three different, clearly disturbed and uncoordinated people who failed anger management class…….
Finally.
The music stops………….. I think.
Im covered in sweat.
About to pass out from panting.

We lost……..
I don’t remember what happened after that. I think she rushed me out of the gym lest they stone us just on general principles alone. Yeah dude……..Good time….FAIL.

I say whip it
Whip it good

Bring it……….bring a sense of humor. Even if you’re the butt of the joke. I promise not to make fun of ya……Im not too cool with that. But I do love a good laugh with someone I care for. Now....I STILL cant stand that song......so I might not bring out a whip but it would be nice to hold my love down and make her forget about a hard day with just the right amount of slow increasing pressure, in the right place and...........then............hold.
The adult world has enough seriousness anyway. Bills, work, raising kids, a bad economy, scarce jobs and gas prices are enough to ruin your day so you better bring sumpin home that will bring a smile or a laugh. Now Im not saying I want you to put on some DEVO or start doing standup….…but it might be nice to be pelted with circus peanuts for a change………hehehehe!

20 comments:

"Seattle" Heather said...

:)

The Invisible Seductress said...

Have unopened bag of Circus Peanuts and rubber band launcher ready!!!! It would be my ultimate fantasy to fling them at you while you dance for me. teeheeeeeeee

"Seattle" Heather said...

I actually didn't hear a word he said today...I was just smiling at the picture...

Okay that's not all true... LOL

Just telling it like it is said...

We need you bust a move on video...

Miss Angie said...

I'll second that!

Kimberly said...

I'm Rick James bitch.

Robyn said...

Oh my goodness. You are too funny!


Hey, good luck on the refocus, be good to yourself and don't forget to whip it, whip it good!

me said...

@ Invisible- ya silly!! they dont even make those until easter! LOL

@ Heather- Hea.....ther!

@ Just- hehehe thats just NOT gonna happen!!

@ Angie- hands waving hehehehehe nope!

me said...

@ Kimberly- I love that!!!

@ Violent- I will..I promise... but you have to as well! :)

Shelly Rayedeane said...

What if I told you someone from Alabama thinks he is the chosen one right now?

But the honest truth is the chosen one was always you.

Have a wonderful time at the homecoming sweetheart.

I'm about ready to whip the shit out of Alabama boys ass.

What can I say? I've always liked them big.

You're 100 times more attractive and a million times less arrogant.

Whip it!

me said...

@ Shelly- My moneys on you for the ass whippin..... :)

gonna inject the 2 cents here

I have a saying that reality trumps all.........

There are people who believe in the black spaghetti monster... and there have been sightings.....

When someone tells me what they "think" or what they "believe" with regard to the christian faith I always respond with

"what you "believe" has NO bearing on what "is" or "isnt" .....i want the facts".......

Barbarella said...

More sauce!! Less Blog... are you running out of memories?

"Seattle" Heather said...

Last night when I was working out on the "treadmill of horror" I thought about flexing in the mirror and taking a picture of myself...just because Trey does it so often. Hee hee. :)

me said...

@ Barb- LOL im pacing myself!

@ Heather- HHEEEA........THHHEERR!!!!

"Seattle" Heather said...

That's my name. Don't wear it out. LOL ha ha ha

Julie D said...

Great, now I'm going to be singing Whip It...Whip It Good...all damn day.

Congrats on the posts!!!

SKB said...

Always liked Whip It - totally undancable as it is - though funk was always #1... how could you not, indeed!

And Trey, I just want to tell you, you have [brought] "sumpin home that will bring a smile or a laugh" to me more often than you can imagine and I genuinely thank you, though I send a big BOOOOOO for the whole pacing thing - hell for leather, I say! Although on second thought, I guess pacing can be a good thing, too... ::eg::

me said...

@ Heather- Gonna wear your name out! LOL

@ Julie- Sorry! Im just glad its not stuck in MY head!!!

@ @ SKB- how sweet! The navy doesnt know what its missin!!! LOL watched top gun last nite and thought about you!

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to stop again...not sure why you can't see the words on my blog :( I am looking into it...hang tight.

The Invisible Seductress said...

gotta bag! Dance