Broken shackles, a parachute, and the drifters

I have mad skills dude…..seriously…if you want it tiled, built, rebuilt, shingled, or wired I AM the fushizzle……OK …so theyre old skills…..but I AM a guy…so I like solving problems…… For the past few weeks I’ve been having a problem. Im a rock…..thats the problem….rocks don’t make good parachutes…..but they DO make excellent stepping stones…..
Shes……..pushing ……ALL the right buttons……..dude is this chess?.....no don’t think so….battleship?...no…..marbles?...no……………archery? LOL…I must have a bullseye on my back……shes singing very sweetly…softly…. …shes dancing very seductively…..shes still…….. taken……maybe I should be focusing on the music instead…..Now I can’t take credit here.

Its the same old story
Same old song and dance, my friend

We used to go watch the drifters at the harvest house of all places. I was typically the only white guy there. But the music really brought a crowd in....lemme tell ya…they didn’t play just oldies ..just a couple of their hits then…….earth wind and fire, Rick james, the commodores, parliamnent. For our little home town it was a PARTY…..Every two weeks when they came through. After the show we would all go back to Leos and party till the sun came up…..then crash…….After a while I lent the drummer some of my cymbals and would bring my bass to jam some…. Out of the blue the lead singer one day cornered me…….. “Do you want to go on the road with us?” …..ha ha ….…wait …what?..... “Youre a great bass player man, do you want to go on the road with us?” …..youre joking right…..I mean…you HAVE a great bass player……”Its not working out…..were having problems”…….
I looked around to see who was listening….. “You know I’m white….….right?” ….he looked dead at me……..”Man……. music aint ABOUT color”……I was silent……He said .”I like you….and you can PLAY……. Think about it” .....
THIS was a problem…... go???......stay???? FRIG!!! I cant just GO dude!!.....How can you NOT go dude???.....
To make a long story short……… I turned it down…… I couldnt jump without a parachute…..or have a solid stepping stone…….I had a good job and in the end old school practicality won out.
But right NOW ……shes testing……me…….and Im much stronger than the caveboys shes accustomed to…… older….smarter……
Her A game surfaces quickly…..the oldest tricks are the best ..no?....her body language is …..intoxicating…….and …..her eyes swell…..softly pleading…….daring me to make her submissive……..the finesse and prowess of a snake charmer…. breathing deeply and slowly……. Shes TAKEN…..

Said love aint the same
On the south side of town
You could look
But you aint gonna find it around

Bring it…….bring a leap of faith. I have……mad skills….but I am not……..a willing parachute…..or a stepping stone…..Love isnt built on broken shackles……A song and dance in chains is……….nothing to a rock. The band is playing……..what’l it be?? This is the last song and dance…….my friend.

late nite yes, hamsters, and the undertaker of love

Working at HoJos as a dishwasher didn’t really offer much in the way of wooing the ladies…….So when I saw her I had to be real s t i l l….. ..and wait for her to leave. I walked up to Debbie and asked….”Debbie…...crinkled nose………who was that?” Oh that’s my sister Anita……silence….Debbie looks me up and down….”why?” …….my head tilts just a little bit…”shes ……….very……. pretty”. Eventually I roped her into going out and the first thing she did was punch me in the arm…” I was all sweaty and wearing a TRACK suit that day you goof”………….we got along GREAT........ But I killed it and didn’t figure out what I’d done until later. Now I can’t take credit here.

Maybe I think too much but something's wrong
There's something here that doesn't last too long
Maybe I shouldn't think of you as mine

In forth grade my hamster died. Bear with me…….he stayed downstairs which wasn’t the warmest place in the house and I went down one day to feed him and play a bit and there he was……… all stiff…..…eyes closed. ……AAAHHHHHH!!!!!!.............Im jumping up and down ONONONONONONO!!!!!! I get him out and run upstairs to the kitchen…. WhadoIdo?whadoIdo?whadoIdo? I get some warm water in a medicine dropper and give it to him…………nuthin……..milk!!! give him some milk!!!!! I get some milk and put it in the dropper…….I give it to him and ……….he sputters…..HES ALIVE!!!!!!!!!! So I keep giving him drops of milk …..for about 2 hours…...he sputters but he’s stiff as a board… later that day I buried him out back in a shoe box……...in the rain…....with a little prayer….……Bout…..mmmm…….6 years later I’m sitting in biology class and the teacher starts talking about how some mammals like bears can hibernate…….”you mean like hamsters?” …… “yes Mr. Logan”…..”like…...when they get cold??”.....”yes Mr. Logan”………fan…….tastic….. I buried my hamster………..alive. It was a bit too late to do anything about it at that point. Yep…… messed that one up……
Anita and I hadn’t been together very long when I made the mistake I couldn’t fix. We were downstairs at her place late one night and EVERYTHING was going……………great……until………..I hear this yes song come on the tv……we’re kissing and Im …………listening to the tv……things start to get a little hotter and heavier.....and Im……….looking over her shoulder so I can see the tv…......its getting HOT and INVOLVED.....…....and …... yeah dude……your messing this up…what ARE you doing dude??? …..your gonna kill it…….your going to bury it in the backyard………...get the shovel……and…..and……yeah dude…its dead……you killed it…..things weren’t the same after that……..Oh I got to see the yes concert…….thats ALL I got to see……….

I take for granted that you're always there

Bring it………bring some common sense……. I could use some. The HoJos is gone and Anita is happy and married…….Thats one I killed before it got started…and yeah….. gotta couple of loves I had to bury in the backyard because I was just NOT thinking right. But I refuse to be known as the undertaker of love. Nowadays love dies easily. Schedules….kids……bills…..wandering eyes and booze ……....make time for love, if you don’t youll kill it………..and I still have a lotta livin and lovin left to do.……. One thing is for sure……..every time I hear a yes tune I smile ……..…just a little…..

Slow cookin, foreigner, and the game winner

Looking back on what I call 8th grade love….. it was nice to see the world with a heart that was uncomplicated…….sweet….and honest. What else would you want love to be? Girls pick up on the courting rituals much faster then boys…..sadly I cant say this is a good idea……a twelve year old girl might get unwanted advances from older boys….but a twelve year old boy isn’t used to being approached by older girls…..I’m lucky …there is this window that I keep open…….its just too nice to shut and I still go back and see the view there from time to time because it gives me comfort. Untainted…….pure…..complete with butterflies and heart pounding……yeah dude……breath in the sun and drown in love…… go ahead and laugh…..I chuckle myself too.
Its not until you’re a little older that courting takes a left turn. I starting dating a girl from high school when she approached me years later, CUTE lemme tell ya, but it’s just this type of bitter taste of adulthood that makes my window stay open…and my eyes…..Now I can’t take credit here.

Head games, always you and me, baby
Head games, 'till I can't take it anymore

We go out ….we have a GREAT time! We set up the next date….I call…she’s busy…. A month goes by…..she calls….…we go out ……we have a GREAT Time….we set up the next date…. I call… she’s busy… a month goes by……she calls…..rinse……….. repeat….. about …..oh…..10 THOUSAND times….. yeah dude...its funny……I can laugh NOW but I just did NOT get it …. This went on for YEARS dude!! Years I SAY!!!.... fool me once shame on you fool me 10 thousand times……well……..i was being slow cooked....a crock (pot) is right.
I’m like most people…..I don’t like my heart played with……what kinda game IS this??? Dude......what IS that smell??.....Oh thats your heart roasting.....There MUST have been something WRONG with me to continue giving her the benefit of the doubt. Well…….. ....Im guilty…….... Ding Ding Ding!!!!! Your a winner!! Dinners ready!!! Come an git it! I can’t say I’m devious or smart by nature…..BUT…….when I finally DO get an idea…….its a good one.
I make the call. We catch up ….and then…….. game on

ME: how about Saturday?
HER: Oh I have to go to my moms..
ME: How bout Sunday?
HER: Oh, my moms coming over here

Small smile

ME: How bout Monday?
HER: Oh I have to work late……
Me: How bout Tuesday?
HER: Well….. I have to get my car looked at

Bigger smile……………. I DONT stop…. loving every minute of it.

Wednesday? Thursday? Friday?........I continue……….for 2 weeks…….I can hear the stress in her voice running out of fake excuses …clearly she’s getting embarrassed having been caught……..and having seen the light I’m not the least bit upset….…. finally she says she has to go…… One month later …..I GET the call……right on time.

HER : How bout next Friday?
ME: well…….Im kinda busy….How bout ………..I call you? …Small smile .......game ....set......match....

It's high time to draw the line
Put an end to this game before it's too late

Bring it………..bring some honesty. I still like games ….Im not proud of everything I do and yeah I’ve played my share. But the grownup world is so hard on peoples hearts ......and thats what makes love so important……..it’s the one thing left that’s hard to find but really worth sharing. lemme tell ya.....I would rather have my butterflies and hand holding than a worthless, shallow head game..….oh I still like foreigner but you can play that …….all by yourself.

Physics, suckers and smoke in the mirror

I’m…………….having a problem. Right NOW……..Yeah dude……….uno grande problemo……shes ………taken….for now………she says…..but that doesn’t stop chemistry from going BOOM! Now does it? No dude…she has……..soft eyes…… and it makes me smile slightly EVERY time I look at her……her voice is far too soothing and….…dude ...reality trumps everything……. Yeah ….I know…BUT SHES TAKEN…….. You can dream all you want…….wish REAL hard……..juggle on a unicycle……I don’t care……..SHES TAKEN…….you might as well…….pretend your going on that shuttle mission…..or playing the lead role in the next Spielberg flick………yeah dude….your WASTING………HELLO??....WASTING YOUR TIME. Be a sucker or a fool…..your choice….take your pick……you can have either one…..take your time….think it through…..Now I can’t take credit here.

Stuck between a rock
And a hard place
Between a rock and a hard place

I’ve been a fool before……..A sucker too. There was this other girl…….we both fell……....chemistry??? No dude….….physics……An atomic bomb went off the very first second we met. I kid you not. The VERY ……..FIRST……….. SECOND. No choice……no decision……BOOOOM!!!!!! I remember that moment clearly…….completely….. BLISS…..JOY…..LOVE…….PERFECTION……PASSION…..UNBREAKABLE WHOLENESS……RIGHT HERE………RIGHT NOW….yeah dude the search was O…….VER……….O V E R ……
She was ……..…taken. .......FRIG!!!! The next few months were no less than …….torture……… FRIG!!!!!!!!!!! SHES %$^*# TAKEN!!!!....... You’re a fool….no…you’re a sucker…..WHO THE ……$@&*#% CARES??
Make no mistake…we felt the same……..Night …….Day…….together….apart……a friggin NIGHTMARE I TELL YOU!!!! And finally……….we decided that she would move the rock……..neither of us could stand it any longer…......she would leave her husband.
And then…….
Everything changed……I kid you not…..Instant flatline. She was 40 years old and I asked her when she wanted to retire. She smiled at me …BIG eyes……..and a grin that would make the grinch who stole Christmas envious slowly spread across her face and she coyly said “41”. …………….shes on her third marriage now.

Give me truth now
Don't want no slam
I'd be hung drawn and quartered for a sheep
just as a well as a lamb

Bring it………bring openness…….I know what smoke and mirrors look like and I did pretty good in chemistry and physics……. I still ………….have a problem though ……right ………now….. Her eyes……. move me and her long blond mane steals mens thoughts and draws jealous fire from all women who see her. She is sweet and demur….. and I am …....a sucker……..or a fool. She is TAKEN……. I have never felt sorry for fools. Suffering fools makes me…….angry. I am just not sure whether being a sucker is all that much better.

The water bed, joe cocker and a weekend track star

Pam was sweet………and well …….endowed…….Dark, long hair and lovely dark eyes. Her mom was a jewel too. She was still living at home when she gave me the news “my mom says you can sleep over”…..Until then it had been late nite makeouts on the living room couch……an lemme say I was good with that…..so when the news came I was ………scared????.......embarrassed????? ……yeah dude………..her MOM said I can sleep with her DAUGHTER……...over night…….....in……....the waterbed……. Gee willickers……...I mean…..
So shes DRAGGIN me into her bedroom literally ………and the business gets going…..…Im FREAKIN cause her moms in the NEXT room…….THE NEXT ROOM……..…..ogodogodogodogod………be quiet…..omanomanoman…. sssshhhhhh……..Now I can't take credit here.

feelin' all right, oh oh
I'm not feelin' too good myself, oh oh

Eventually the hormones get the best of me and I… CENSORED ……and she…CENSORED………..and then we….CENSORED..some more……..until…..we collapse in full sweat…….her head on my chest , her hand on my arm…….just enjoying the moment….
I reach over and…………….there’s the CENSORED spot……..we rest……hmmm pretty big……..I am………a MAN. A few minutes later my hand hits the same spot again….hmmmm that’s REALLY big……I am a BIG MAN!!!!!.........we rest………a few minutes later…….I feel something wet….. I reach over and the spot is……. HUGE!!!!!!………..I m not THAT big of a man…..what IS that??? The lights go on and …..…….the water beds busted……….oman………….OMANOMANOMAN!!!!…..…we throw on clothes and start rushing around…..Im running through the house like a professional track star on fire and the house is ALIVE with us rushing to the hall closet, to the bathroom , tearing the bed apart…….and I meet her mom in the hall….WHATS GOING ON?????....I stop ……cold………...I have this …..…..blank stare …UH……….…….…..Pam pushes between us…”the waterbeds busted mom”………all the blood runs out of my head……….and her mom hands me a stack of towels......

Seems I got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dream
Imprisoned by the way it could have been

Bring it……..Bring …. a place to stay…… cause I am NOT going through that again……..Pam and I had some really good memories but I was young and shallow. Pam was……...well……..endowed….. and we were so comfortable together that her frame caught up with the rest of her. I felt a bit out of place and my attempts to change things weren’t effective until………… we broke up. We talked a few years later and had a good laugh when she ribbed me that I never got to see her after that “cause she was HOT!!!!!” and everything was good between us….. but from now on…….. I think ill just stick to my sealy posturepedic

Boston, the YMCA and pennies in the pool

Who doesn’t LOVE the water??? All those opposed need not bring it…You’re excused. Yeah dude…I lived in the country and I learned to swim at the YMCA. Inner city kids in their underwear and some of them in the buff….no joke dude. My mom was banned from the local pool because she left me in one of those big ass cribs and I had pooped and spread it all over everything including myself. . BUT…….
By seventh grade I was a fish….I don’t remember who told me that Jennifer thought I was cute. JENNIFER?????...REALLY??? WHO TOLD YOU THAT???ARE YOU SURE????REALLY???..... but I spent the ENTIRE summer trying to get her attention.
This would NOT be easy. There’s like ……COOL high school guys….…big guys….like……...with cars. I’m supposed to compete with THIS???
OK …challenge accepted. I swim the length of the pool…..underwater……DID SHE SEE ME???? HUH???.....DID SHE SEE THAT??? Im buying people ice cream…..I got that cool new towel…………..nuthin…..
Alright ….that’s IT….I’m upping my game…..I’m getting at least …….10 pennies off the deep end bottom…….yeah dude……im…..pressive.
I dive in ….and crack heads with Jody……somebody pulls me out…....then there was the time I thought it would be cool to spin around on the diving board and get all dizzy before I went in….I fell off and hit the concrete……….
Clearly my courting skills needed some refining….who was I kidding?......they needed an overhaul….
A few years later I get…….…..the call. Party? …. Jennifers?....... Parents gone? Dude I am THERE. Now I can’t take credit here.

I'm gettin' ready for a party tonight
Yes I'm gettin' ready to cruise
And if you've got somethin' for me
I've got somethin' for you

By now I’m life guarding AND driving. Ok dude..its sink or swim. I take the car….put the top down, crank up the foreigner…. and race over there…….everyones around back so I make my dramatic entrance…….I drive ACROSS the yard and around the house…….. shades on.....music blarin. Its wet so the car starts spinning so I give it more gas to keep it going. ….by the time I get around back everyone is staring and there is mud flying, music blasting and the car just TEARS up the lawn. I rev the engine and it sinks deeper and deeper until it finally comes to a complete stop……………total silence…..….. I will NOT be swimming today….. In fact I will be sinking……..I feel like sinking…..yep Im sinkin…….got that part down …..I finally got her attention

Baby, it's a party as long as you're there
It's a party, party, party!

I turned the music off…… It took everyone pushing to get me out of there. Its ok. …..That relationship sank but it wouldn’t keep me from jumping back in.
Bring it……bring a flotation device…..if you can’t ….Ill share. I’ve learned its good to be ready ….just in case someone wants to swim. ……breaks over!!!!!!

The orchard, the silver barrel, and barnyard love.....

Dude I am just NOT a runner. Oh I’ll run if a car….. or my exwife is chasing me…Nowadays it seems like you have to run everywhere…. Life as an adult seems to require it…..I know ….football requires running…. Im good with that….I love sports…I just have to have a good reason to run….. In in 8th grade I got one.
Jody and I would camp out in my backyard that summer. It was fun…flashlights, comic books, peanut butter crackers. Beyond my backyard was ……the apple orchard…….beyond that was……...the party. The sun was setting behind Tinker mountain when we stepped out of the tent and stared at the orchard. What WAS that sound???.....Dude what IS that????? Its…..its….the doobie brothers??????? In the ORCHARD????? ……..When it was almost dark we snuck out. The music got louder as we crossed barb wire fences and wandered through chest high weeds…..Now I cant take credit here.

Down around the corner
A half a mile from here
You can see them long trains run
And you watch them disappear
Without love

Finally we step out of the orchard into…….a sea of TALL people………ogodogodogodogod……..I admit fear on the threshold of freedom, and its clear my childhood will die………. tonight. The altar of manhood is a no turning back, one way ticket and the world of my boyhood is to be sacrificed here…….right now.
We wind through the packed crowd. Faces flicker in and out from the bonfires dancing flames. Some guy pumps a beer from this silver barrel and hands me a big plastic cup. He smiles, and I nod in genuine appreciation……my voice squeaks and I yell....THANKS DUDE!!!!!
Doobie brothers is right. The air is full of this unfamiliar smell and every sip of beer makes me frown and half gag. People LIKE this SHIT????? The band is playing on a flatbed trailer….. Butchering tunes so unbelievably loud you have to scream everything AND read lips!!!!!
An hour later Im sitting ON the silver barrel, pumping out golden fun for all the lovely L A D I E S….oh yeah dude….Im buzzin. Somebody grabs my hand and pulls me through the crowd. Suddenly Mitzi and I are dancing and kissing……..MITZI???? ……….MITZI????? She leads me to the barn and we start making out…the world is whirling now… everything is perfect……..until somebody spins me around…….its Jody…… TOOFA KAY IBBA POONA FOOBLE!!!!!!! Wha??? …..POONA FOOBLE!!!!! I look over his shoulder and see my mom’s car moving slowly through the crowd…….ogodogodogodogod….OGODOGODOGOD!!!!!! I stand up …..and immediately fall over. I stand up again and start to run …..….sideways….my arms outstretched like Frankenstein……..omanomanomanoman…..the earth shakes and the crowd bounces…. A complete blur….
The orchard is pitch black and when I look at the stars the world spins under me as I run …blindly through row after row of trees ….panting and full of panic.... I don’t get sick until I realize………...were lost……fan……tast…….ic…... I fall over in the weeds….and my head fills with puke…..
Time passes and I wake up in the tent ….my mom says “where have you been??” Jody and I both roll over and sleep till 10 in the morning.


Where would you be now
Without love

Bring it…....bring some goody powders and some coffee. As an adult I’m always running so I really love this memory…I still could probably use a good run….and a sleep in till 10!!!!!.........The apple orchard is no longer there…..but I still like my fun.

The call, the trash, and love at HoJos

Dude …..I got the call…….yep….this morning…..yes I warned her…..you know I did…..3 months into the marriage and she is already talking divorce. We talked about it for MONTHS….months I SAY……late night…..cell phone batteries dying….she said she was sure…..I said………it didn’t matter what I said….she wasn’t………. listening…….goofa me tooble….. snoff a poppa IBBA kibby foot ….. k? Garbage in……garbage out. Now I can’t take credit here.

Got a call from an old friend
We used to be real close

Lemme tell ya……takin out the garbage at Howard Johnsons was NOT fun. Ofcourse it had to be done at the end of the night and on a Friday……payday….. when you had a date and it was the LAST thing to do…….you were in R U S H mode……By this time you stunk from the sweat and hot dishwater that soaked you in between running to bus tables. Wet from head to foot the dishwashers would do their best to be invisible to the waitresses that still looked HOT at evenings end. Which was hard considering you stunk and were carrying 50 lbs of dirty dishes ….every time you they saw you. The floor was a slip and slide from the sloshing and stacks of hot plates would burn you as you slid from place to place cussing out your friends who were working at blockbuster. So Chad and I are wheeling out the trash to the dumpster and I stand behind him just to be safe. He pulls out this overstuffed bag full of disgusting waste and gears up to heave it into the dumpster. On the backswing…….. the bag EXPLODES…..ALL OVER ME. I am covered, and I mean COVERED in leftovers…..I am SOOOO pissed ………..and end up puking and laughing at the same time until my cheeks and side can take it no more.
It was ok. Chad was my male soul mate and my date after work was my female soul mate Valerie. A change of clothes and life was good again. Valerie and I got some beer and laid out in her driveway and we both looked up at the stars while I stroked her hair. Casual, playful talk….. Sweet smiles…..I can…..SEE …..INSIDE her when she stares at me…... Completely at ease and nothing could have been more perfect.

Chad died in a car accident. Valerie died from some prescription drug…………………….They’re……both…………….…gone…………

I’m crying as I type and my world ……..just………….stops.

Ah, but sooner or later you sleep in your own space
Either way it's okay to wake up with yourself
I don't need you to worry for me cause I'm alright

Bring it……..bring…………..what matters. The girl I gotta call from has severe kidney problems…….for starters. Her marriage is already a mess. Now a days people are anxious to talk…… they have financial problems, emotional problems, coworker problems…..marital problems. I like to be heard too. I also like to listen. Nothing pisses me off more than to talk and have someone NOT hear me. Garbage in…..garbage out…...Riiiingggg……………...Hello?

Trees, the affair, and myopea of the heart

Yeeah dude….I missed it…..totally. I just did NOT see it. Oh I saw the forest for sure….just missed those damn tress….its the trees stupid….yeah I got it……I GOT IT……..now….
My buddy Leo missed it too…...so did Evan. I hadn’t seen Leo in a while so it was good to catch up. He had the family van and I had the cheap beer. So we’re riding around the old back roads of high school, belting out classics and swapping stories that spark memory and uncontrolled laughter that brings tears…..and then I ask…..”Hows Robin?” ….she’s fine …she’s listening to country music lately though……..now I cant take credit here.

Or did I miss again
I think I missed again oh

“Shes cheating on you”…..WHAT?...no shes not …I let it go……the call came exactly one week later. “WHAT DO YOU KNOW? YOU KNOW SOMETHING!! HOW DID YOU KNOW?? …Leo what ARE you talking about?? “SHE MOVED IN WITH SOME GUY!!
Evan REALLY missed it. He and the wife went to a marriage counselor who asked him what he wanted. He gave his 20 minute story about things, honestly and constructively and then the councelor asked his wife who said “I want Evan…..to LEAVE ME ……..THE HELL ALONE!!!!! His wife apparently had a thing for the neighbor’s wife. Fun Fun.
Me? I missed it too. The details aren’t important but lets just say when I got back from counseling church camp for a week with my daughter I found out she was on her second affair.

Im waiting in line
Would you say if I was wasting my time?

Fall is starting and….. I can …...FEEL it. The forest dies but the trees…..BEAUTIFUL…..bright and colorful in the light breeze. It makes you stop and stare.

Bring it…….bring some vision. Do I miss the forest??......No…...The trees more than make up for it. Some people want the forest to be around forever…even when theyre not happy anymore. When you ask them how the forest is……they say the forest is ok……its fine…..I’m alright…….Im surviving….I’ll pretend the forest is ok …for the kids…..
I couldnt stop the fall from coming…and that’s ok…turns out it was worth the wait. I LOVE the fall….you just have to remember when it comes……to get back up.

Torturetown, the goalie, and a chair is still a chair

Oh dude…..the neighbors up the street were HARD to associate with….I’m pretty sure they wanted it that way. Im telling you……this bunch put the dysfunctional in dysfunctional family. So uptight, never outside, no emotion….they had a daughter; she went to an all girl’s school and met a few girlfriends there. So…….I was out of the picture as far as a love interest goes. But the parents……they didn’t even like each other!!!!!!….it must have been miserable to live in torturetown like that….The house was lifeless and quiet and so was their marriage. Now I can’t take credit here.

A chair is still a chair, even when there's no one sittin' there
But a chair is not a house and a house is not a home
When there's no one there

Yeah dude….its depressing….I think a lot of married couples struggle. Yeah…. Im a soooper genius. I see a lot of people unhappy in their singleness, pining for someone to complete themselves. Agonizing over lost love….whats the goal here??? Do you want to be married….or happy?? Do you want a successful relationship or a failed marriage???
Well???........
I think women have a lot more to lose than men when a marriage fails because they have usually invested more time in the fantasy of marriage rather than the reality of a relationship. HEAR ME…..when girls are playing house and dolls …guys are throwing rocks at trees…….You want to be a good mom….we want to be good at throwing rocks at trees. You want to raise a family…we want to be good at throwing rocks at trees. Its even clear that the marriage ceremony is the woman’s day….a mans responsibility is……show up and don’t be drunk. Doesn’t that tell you something? It speaks to ME!!! You can put the relationship in the toilet…suffer abuse…..sometimes even cheating…but as long as you stay MARRIED….I hear women speak of marriage as “the goal” … If that’s your goal then I might as well be a goalie. The goal is a healthy happy relationship. A mans measure is whether he is marriage material?????? No wonder girls are pissed off……look at the guy sitting next to you…….has he spent his life preparing to be a husband and father???? An unhappy marriage might as well be a prison of failure. Parole is sounding PRETTY good……

When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there, sayin' that you're still in love with me,

I admit it…guys want to be good at throwing rocks…no where in the rock throwing manual does it say DON’T yell and write down all your checks.
Bring it…..…bring the right priorities. Happy people make happy relationships (and marriages). Guys are sorrowfully lacking in understanding what it means to be a good husband and lover. Being dark, mysterious and a bad boy doesn’t make me an ideal catch but Im lucky….its taken me a long time to get that a woman needs to feel safe and secure. Im willing to bet that women can be just as unprepared for the hardship of marriage too because the fantasy comes first while the reality of communication, compromise and marital strife gets swept under the carpet.
Hand me some rocks will ya??