whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Jacks ,silly putty, and a scoop of vanilla


Dude……silly putty?......are you serious? Yeah dude…Im old…..frisbees, marbles, jacks, and………...silly putty……My parents used to get a break from me when I was growing up by sending me to my grandmoms for a week each summer. So yeah were talking way before cell phones and video games. So I was at grammas mercy to entertain her with elementary math skills and prowess at spelling Mississippi. The reverse was true as well. She was in charge of keeping me busy. After recounting tales of my moms youth (mom apparently put a worm in her moms salad one day as a joke and forgot all about it until after dinner) and looking through countless black and white photos of people I would never know …….. I got to play with silly putty. Which….kept me occupied for all of……….12 minutes. You would think that the endless possibilities of having something in your hand that you could mold into anything you wanted would be attractive……….thats a noper………not a yepper. Now I can’t take credit here.

Youre no good for me
And Im no good for you

I have to admit Im an extremist. If its really safe and easy then Im probably doing it……… wrong. Bear with me……When I was young….. if a model was a snap together it didn’t take a lot of effort and I got bored pretty easy with it. If I played football against younger kids I really wasn’t entertained all that much. So shooting fish in a barrel loses its appeal quickly.
I like a challenge…….. a push…….someone with drive…….backbone……I have dated some girls who were so compliant that the fire was more like a match. Im italian…… Its ok to have a bonfire……I like love that makes you warm and hot inside…..To me thats much more reassuring and satisfying than being passive in a relationship. Yes I am a soooper genius........
I’m going to withold a name here. I dated this wirey little thing once. Our physical bond was ………..STRONG…..
….”the thought of having you all to myself to spoil and make feel safe and secure will only make you hungry and content when I ……hold you still …… and your body tightens up……and I…….slowly apply pressure….……right where you want…….….and hold it………and whisper three words in your ear to drive you”…….yeah dude …….that kind of strong…..we ALMOST took her to the ER once . She had chest pains that scared me to death after we had been sweating for nearly 8 hours……time flies when youre…….well… you know…
Ultimately we werent compatible for other reasons…..Long story short…..I have never loved vanilla ice cream……..I take that back……I did once…….were divorced now.

American woman
Get away from me
American woman
Mama let me be
I gotta go
I gotta get away

Bring it………..bring something to go with the silly putty. Mind you I don’t have bad memories of silly putty. The ability to bend and stretch yourself is a good quality. Certainly one you want in a lover. What you don’t want is OVER submission to the point of …..vanilla ice cream……..if you think your being desirable by just…laying there ….cause your letting him do what he wants ….well that’s just silly…….putty. Would you rather your man do everything you ask and not be able to lead? ………Jacks???......Anyone?

22 comments:

Miss Angie said...

I completely agree! Vanilla ice cream is sooo plain! Once in a while it's good, but bring on the chocolate sauce and whipped cream every other time! :)

f1trey said...

@ Miss Angie- I ve seen those pics of you covered in blood....I like the whip cream idea much better! LOL

"Seattle" Heather said...

I maybe a white American girl..but I'm not boring Vanilla icecream I can promise you that. HA HA

f1trey said...

@ Heather- oh NO my 1/4 russian beauty with nearly clear eyelashes......You are NOT to be confused with vanilla.......

MaLou Silverman said...

Rocky road, that the ice cream flavor for you - marshmallows, nuts, bits of chocolate, some dried fruits. Have you tried it?

Over submission? That's silly, that could be suffocating as well. Everyone loves adventure, zest, joie d vivre,..... even once a week :)

Amy said...

A guy told me once that you can get a really good sense of a woman by what her favorite ice cream is, and what kind of lingrie she wears on Sunday afternoons.

I think he's on to something.

"Seattle" Heather said...

Isn't there a drink called a White Russian? LOL I've never had one...

f1trey said...

@ MaLou- yes rocky road rocks! I kinda like butter pecan too!!Being TOO good has its drawbacks.....I agree!

@ Amy- LOL I was told never date a woman who orders a salad on your first date....she would be boring to sleep with....My true gauge.....this isnt going to go over well ...is.."what kind of music do you like?" ....that tells me right away.....

@ Heather- its geting colder you might have to have 2 ......or 10!!!!!! I confess Ive never had one either!! something new to try!

The Invisible Seductress said...

Trey,,it's Disturbed, Seether, Staind and the like for me....and by the way,,,if you put silly putty on a bare light bulb it does NOT glow any brighter..

..but,,,,you DO get to temporarily evacuate your home due to the fumes AND your butt hurts for weeks.

but I wouldn't know anything about that...

f1trey said...

@ Invisible- I DO like music with teeth.....gettin kinda burnt on buckcherry stuff...lamb of god, crooked x seem to satisfy as of late.....

at least you didnt try to eat the silly putty....a burnt butt might be better than a trip to the ER.....LOL

April said...

I got your jacks right here!! hee hee.

You're right, neither men or women can be vanilla silly putty. There's gotta be something more. =)

f1trey said...

@ April- I know that this posting must feel abit "common sense"...Im not the smartest guy.....But I kinda wanted to hit something on the head about something i have run into before and that is ......i think some women mistakenly have the impression that "if you let a man do whatever he wants in bed" thats a good thing.....wrong...men dont want wet noodles......we do like submission but there is a difference between being lazy and submission....trust me ...WE can tell!!!!

S. Eutin said...

Jacks! OMG, I loved jacks. And silly putty worked great on the Sunday funnies. haha

Yea, I know what you mean. Passion! Between the sheets and out. No one wants to be the only one making the decisions and all the moves. Boring!

Now that doesn't mean you can't agree, and certainly don't be disagreeable for the sake of being disagreeable, but we are still individuals and we can compliment each other, know what I mean?

Kimberly said...

Nothing wrong with vanilla. It's American, it's classic.

Nothing wrong with Silly Putty. It's a childhood classic.

Nothing wrong with a little pressure around the neck. It's a little borderline freaky.

booshy said...

I'm thinking you need to try that kind from Ben & Jerrys...Everything But The Kitchen Sink...now THAT'S a relationship worth mentioning.

f1trey said...

@ S- Yay! you got it! Cool...I like it when a plan comes together.....Women Im sure do NOT wantt to make all the decisions OUTSIDE the bedroom...men do not want to make all the decisions IN the bedroom.....it might sound like common sense but.......

@ Kimberly- LOL X2 thats perfect!!! you rock! XXX OOO

@ Booshy- wish I had come up with that! LOL Be glad your in Atlanta! its cold as all get out up here!!!!

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

Trey, I freakin' love this... Ain't this just how it is... You gotta keep me guessing, be your own person do your own thing, I mean sure I want a guy that will let me tie him up... but I also want one that can say not tonight hun... heading out with the boys. Hot is never loosing sight of yourself... And Kimberly totally has it right... nothing wrong with a little pressure on the neck...

f1trey said...

@ Love- thanks darlin!!!! Ima tryin!! You and Kimberly!!!! ya buncha freaks! LOL keep it comin......

April said...

Oh I hope you didn't think I was saying DUH, everyone knows that! Because I wasn't. I was merely agreeing with you. Even if this may seem like common sense, there are often many people (women especially) who do just let the man do whatever. So yeah, you did good.

f1trey said...

@ April- I have no doubt you are everything BUT vanilla!!! Yeah that really was ma point..were on the same page........have we ever been on separate pages?

SKB said...

Glad you clarified vanilla lazy versus submission and others threw in the freak bits, I was beginning to worry. ;)

f1trey said...

@ SKB- make no mistake I do love submission...... but I have found some people only have that tool in their tool box...and thats what i call lazy.... Ive had girls who made no effort in bed AT all...... gbye.....