whatcha ona bout girl??

whatcha ona bout girl??
A retrospective on the inner workings of love, flying pancakes, mensa disasters, dandelion cookies, number bending, super salt, bubblegum oysters, chicken spit, crystal kidneys, guerilla carrots, polychromatic tofu, paraphysics, tender vigilanties, black sand, phillastine placebos, wood soup, buttered shuttlecocks, apostrophe training, fish whips, bleeding speed, plastic fantastic lobster telephones, venus drug rehab, clowns on fire, kiosks on a leash, marshmello overcoats, bottled light, fried blood, unbridled hyperthyroidism, folding wine, amygdula tickling, fainting in coils, hamburgers for the apocalypse, plastic memes, and conjugal fritters.....well...the love parts true

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Heroin, wonder woman, and oceans11


OK…..I’m coming clean…..I admit it….I had….I mean have….…a heroin addiction. I do!!! Really!!!!....Im a BAAAADD man! …..I just love those female superheroes. Wonder woman has got it goin ON!!!! Oh yeah Dude…….wait a minute…..No I mean heroin …like the drug….yeah….thats it….since 5th grade!!! You’re not buying this ……..are you?
Ok…..well…..then Im a gambler…big one too.…that’s my habit…..Heck yeah I play the lottery…dude…..…I am THE scratch off king.
Last Saturday I went to the dog track and hit the casino. Alone of course. …..I have never been to a casino before and I’m saving a trip to Vegas for my next girlfriend……I get all giddy walking in….this is SOOO COOL……..yeah dude….I’m like…..Danny Ocean……6.5 …..or something….well…..without the looks…….and the money….I got fifty bucks burnin in my pocket. I walk around in amazement for like…..30 minutes and nurse a beer from the bar……..well…...there goes 5 bucks. I stroll over to a security guard and ask him where to get change. He says at the cashier they can break hundreds and thousand dollar bills and generously points for me. I blink twice. Thanks I said. I walk up to a machine and realize people are feeding 20 dollar bills in…….I pull out a crisp one dollar bill……and pull the handle……again and again and again……I got nothing but assorted fruits…..thirty seconds later I’m whipping out the money to show this machine who’s boss cuz…I am NOT a quitter. Im instantly addicted. comeoncomeoncomeon…..Eventually I come out ahead and cash in about 15 bucks…..more beer here…I’m afraid to order a mixed drink and end up not having enough gas money to get home. Now I cant take credit here.

Something happens and Im head over heels
I never find out till Im head over heels

I can’t STAND to hear people say their playing the game of love when they’re not. They’re not in the game AT all. DON’T tell me your playin….I can tell when you’re bluffing!! Dude…you got NO hand…..NO chips……what ARE you doing? Ive seen oceans 11…It’s a LOVE story …..Its not a b o u t the money

Don’t take my heart don’t break my heart
Don’t don’t throw it away

I pass the high rollers room in flip flops and head to the track. Program in one hand a beer in the other. The dogs file out one by one and I study them like I know what I’m doing….the program is conveniently written in greek….. so I have to go with my gut…….Dude…… I win the first three races….enough to pay for everything that nite. Cool dude……I might lose some but I wont win if I don’t play.
Holding your cards close to your chest? Poker face? Waitin on the perfect man?..… I mean hand? Only bet on a SURE thing? Hes got to be at least 5’10??
Dude….Driving a car is a gamble. Swimming is a gamble….. are you telling me your going to sit out on the ONE thing that makes life wonderful??……One thing I DO know……You gotta pay to play. Love is a gamble. Its trust. Its submission. Its loss of control. If youre in control your NOT in love. My bet is on wonder woman.
You gonna bet or what???

9 comments:

Kimberly said...

Everything is a gamble. Love, fish, vodka - any of those could kill you. But I agree...you have to pay to play. Just like to make money you have to spend money. I am a gambler and I will split face cards, hit on 17 - it is called gambling for a reason. I prefer men taller than 5'10, have dimples but that is not to say I've never dated a shorter person but it is to say I've never dated a non-dimpler.

me said...

YOU GOT IT!!! SNOOPY DANCE SNOOPY DANCE!!!

Anonymous said...

Love is submission? It would seem noone's ever been in love with me. Sit out the game? I'll cash in my chips and leave the casino. There's a whole lotta world outside this (stacked) deck of cards - and it's not all just dogs running circles with their tongues hanging out.

me said...

@romantic seul- Love is submission? It would seem noone's ever been in love with me.

my use of submission has a definition thats contextual....hear me out...

Im absolutely sure there has been a man in your past that could NOT help himself and put his heart up on the block for you....thats the submission im referring to....if you are unavailable NO love will be possible ...you have to be willing to thaw your past.....

Sit out the game? I'll cash in my chips and leave the casino. Im stealing your chips so you cant go....BUT youre doing the right thing by finding YOUR happiness FIRST..... (this is between you and me) You are a pearl of unbelievable price..thats why you havent sold.....((stop giving me that look)).....Finding a partner for someone of your caliber will be tough...tough i say...NOW...if you were to say ...think mcdonalds is great food and watch a lot of reality tv...im willing to bet there are plenty of guys that fit the bill...but thats NOT you....

There's a whole lotta world outside this (stacked) deck of cards -
Some games CAN fool you into thinking you have a shot....I dont play those.....

and it's not all just dogs running circles with their tongues hanging out.

PANT PANT PANT...hehehe

Anonymous said...

...cricket sounds...


I'm TRYING to stop with the look. Pearl of...


I can't go out with this look on. It will draw comment.

Pearl...

Please go get me a sandwich. I can't go out at the moment...

Uh. I mean, thank you.

Tortoiseshell/mother-of-pearl?

Violet said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Violet said...

"If you're in control, you're NOT in love."

Love that! And a good reminder today - thanks, Trey. :)

Miss Angie said...

You are so right, everything is a gamble. I love how beautifully you word it all here, it flows and it makes sense! :)

It perked me a up a bit, as my love life has been broke for quite some time. Pockets are empty, it seems...

:) Thanks for writing!

me said...

@Angie- You just made my day! Really!! thanks darlin!!!!!